9 year old girls masturbate

Masturbation during puberty: a taboo subject?

Teen Masturbation: Here's the Best Way to Handle It

Parents often find it difficult to talk to their teenagers about certain aspects of sexuality. Some parents are also unsure how to deal with the subject of "masturbation". Read here why masturbation is completely normal and how you should deal with it.

When children hit puberty, the sex hormones go crazy. Lust awakens, curiosity about one's own body and that of the opposite sex grows. In the past, masturbation was frowned upon or even “forbidden”, but now people have come to believe that it is part of healthy sexual development and human development. During masturbation, the young person gets to know his body and his needs. And he practices how to deal with it and satisfy his lust. Boys usually have a very casual relationship with this, and for most of them masturbation is considered "normal" behavior. Talking about it and making jokes about it is therefore often easy for them in their clique. According to a study, girls have a somewhat divided relationship with this, with opinions ranging from “It's quite normal” to “I don't do that”. The latter attitude may have something to do with backward role models, according to which a sexually active girl is quickly labeled as a "slut".

Teen Masturbation: How To Handle It

Many parents these days have a fairly relaxed relationship with the subject of masturbation. And that's good! Still, parents sometimes feel ashamed to talk about it or are unsure how to deal with it. This is completely normal because each of us has a natural limit of shame. In the following overview you will find tips on how to best deal with the topic of sexuality.


Tips and answers on how best to deal with this topic

  • Which posture is helpful? How should I behave?
    Stay relaxed. It is normal for your child to develop lust now and to want to (and must) satisfy it. If you have educated your child well, they are also well prepared theoretically and mentally.
  • What should I do if I catch my child "red-handed"?
    In no case be loud or scold, this remains negative and occupies the subject of eroticism with fear or shame. Don't make a remark like "What are you doing?" That also puts your child in dire straits. The best thing to do is to apologize discreetly and withdraw. You can come back to the topic later by saying something to your child that will ease their shame, such as: B: "You, that's totally okay, I did that too when I was young" or "Everyone does that". Because your child will definitely find it very embarrassing to have been "caught".
  • What do I do if I find porn magazines or videos in my son's room?
    Check your impulse: Do you just want to discreetly let it go? Or do you want to address it? But be careful: if you want to address it, ask yourself exactly what it is about for you. Be careful with moral sermons or lecture halls. They are more likely to trigger feelings of guilt, or the adolescent is not listening properly. Pay attention to which media your child / son consumes and from what age the videos etc. are allowed and, if necessary, point this out to your son.
  • From what age is masturbation normal, from when do I have to expect it?
    It is very different. Some children masturbate as early as primary school age, some do not start until they are 12 or 13 years old. All of this is normal and nothing to worry about.
  • What do I do if my child masturbates excessively / very often?
    It is quite normal for adolescents to masturbate frequently at times. Sometimes adolescents also reduce internal tension and stress through frequent masturbation. You only have to intervene when the child obviously no longer has control over it or when school and friendships are suffering. This is very rarely the case and could indicate an obsessive-compulsive disorder. A child and youth therapist could help here.