Why do people always forget my name
Uhhhhhh ... how again? | Why some people
Forgot name immediately
You will be introduced to someone at a party. You remember the face, every detail of the conversation - but the NAME seems to be erased?
Forgetting names is an embarrassing problem. We asked an expert why many struggle with it and what can be done about it.
It's our brains to blame. When we get to know someone new, it decides what information to store and what not. Elmar Basse (50), psychologist from Hamburg: "The rational memory only picks up a name for a short time and is usually immediately claimed by the abundance of sensory impressions."
► Information such as noises, movements, a joke, a touch are preferred... The brain can store around seven to nine of these units. Contextless terms like names have no priority for the brain in the first few seconds. We can't remember.
This is INDEPENDENT of how sympathetic we are to our counterpart at first glance!
Basse: “The relevance structure only builds up in the brain after I have got to know someone.” So if we have already decided that someone is important to us - or particularly attractive - the name is better off.
The environment plays a special role: "When you are at home and someone new comes to visit, you tend to remember their impressions much better than they do - because everything is new to them."
The more new sensory impressions shower us, the worse the chances are that we will be able to remember the name.
In addition, “Meier” is harder to remember than “Müller-Lüdenscheidt”. Even if someone lisps or we have to ask, the likelihood that we will remember their name increases, explains Basse.
The more noticeable, the more important the information becomes for our brain - and the more likely we are to remember. Loud music, for example, makes things difficult. And: Everyone's attention span is different. People with photographic memory tend to remember more.
That helps against it
The expert advises repeating the name of the other person briefly and in a friendly manner during the conversation. "Mr. Meier, you actually have... ". That should help. A charming side effect: The other feels valued.
If you want to be absolutely sure that the other person remembers your name: First chat, then introduce.
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