How can I describe my feelings
Describing feelings: How to find out how you are now
For many people it is extremely difficult to even roughly determine how they are doing or even to describe their feelings. That should change now. In this article I want to show you a few simple but very effective ways how you can recognize your inner feeling and describe this feeling. You will also learn how to deal with your feelings constructively so that they do not stand in the way of your life and your development. In this article you will learn how to recognize your current feeling as well as the original feeling that lies deeper within you.
- Increase the feeling by breathing
- Describe feeling based on the weather
- Exposing the basic feeling
- Find the right sentence
- Dealing with the feeling correctly
- Find the feeling of origin
- Describing feelings: conclusion
Recognize feeling better: Reinforce the feeling with your breathing
There is a trick you can use to strengthen the connection with your feeling. That is deep and full breathing. That means you breathe deeply into your stomach, fill it with air. Then you fill your chest with air. You do that as often as it is good for you.
Pay attention to your feelings and what you perceive in the body. Most likely you will notice how you get closer and closer to the feeling. Then it will be much easier for you to determine it and consequently to describe the feeling.
The background to this breathing exercise is that it supplies your body with energy. This energy is needed for you to be able to feel at all.
There are avoidance patterns to avoid feelings, for example by shallow breathing where very little oxygen enters the body. We want to reverse that with deep and full breathing. If you want to experience this process in depth, I recommend breathing meditation, which aims exactly to connect with your feelings and to release them. More on this article: "Breath Meditation: The Miracle of Breath and How You Can Use It for Your Aliveness".
Describe feelings based on the internal weather
Describe feelings: Which weather situation corresponds most closely to the feeling?
A first, more visual way of describing your own feeling is the weather. You can see which weather situation best suits your current mood.
If you feel lazy and listless, cloudy, rainy weather with gray clouds in the sky might best describe your feeling. With joy and happiness more sunshine. Try to find a suitable picture in which you determine your feeling not only through the weather, but possibly also through the environment.
Do you feel awake like a cold, refreshing mountain lake? Or somehow dry and empty like a desert landscape?
Describe feelings: expose the basic feeling
Now it's getting really exciting. We are now starting to get closer and closer to your actual feeling. To do this, we go through the five basic emotions that are very often related to the feeling we have in the moment. These are:
So go through these five basic feelings and see which one best describes your current feeling. Are you more likely to feel angry, sad, afraid, happy, or ashamed?
Describe your feeling even more precisely: Find the right sentence
After you have determined the main feeling of your mood, you can begin to form a sentence according to your feeling that starts like this:
"I am angry / sad / afraid / pleased / ashamed because ..."
After the “because” we add the reason why we have this feeling in the sentence. Many, if not all, feelings have a specific trigger and therefore a reason.
Here is an example using an anger that is there now. We add a "because" in the 2nd part of the sentence to find the reason for the feeling:
"I'm so angry because the bus drove out from under my nose again."
When you have found the sentence that best describes your current feeling, it will bring you a lot of clarity for the current situation.
How do I deal with the feeling now?
Describe the feeling, identify it and then just feel it
The best way to deal with a feeling is to stick with it completely. You devote your full attention to your feelings for this. Of course, that only works if you stop thinking about it. Thinking is not feeling and thus only keeps you from feeling. Feelings just want to be felt, however, and that's the only way you can let them go: just feel.
Recognize the deeper feeling: Find the original feeling
When you are done feeling through, you can go deeper and find the source of the feeling. Feelings are built up in layers and so one feeling lies on top of the other. They are all related to one another, often linked to a thought.
It makes sense to feel through all these layers little by little in order to finally break through to the original feeling. If you also feel this original feeling through, many other feelings that would otherwise complicate your life will be resolved.
Once you fully feel the great fear of death, your many small fears will disappear in everyday life.
If you sit down in meditation and focus on your feelings, you will automatically feel through layer by layer. This is part of the natural self-healing mechanism. The feeling that is currently on the surface always comes to the fore. You can find out how to do this in the article “Learn to meditate”.
Of course, you can also get closer to the original feeling via the cognitive level by questioning yourself. Make sure, however, that you keep focusing on the feeling and letting the feelings happen instead of just describing the feelings.
Try to go as deep as you can with the question "Why?" The meaning behind this is that we want to get to the actual feeling in the depth, which is the original trigger for the feeling on the surface.
The sentence above, with which you described your feeling, then changes a little because there is no longer any direct trigger. Therefore the "because" disappears again and the sentences can look like this after the above example after we ask ourselves the question "Why?":
"I'm so angry because the bus drove out from under my nose again."
"I'm afraid of being late for work."
"I'm afraid my boss will be mad at me"
"I am afraid that I will lose my job."
"I am afraid that I will fail in my existence."
We have now arrived at the origin in a very existential feeling that is deeply anchored in all of us. The fear of failing completely and losing everything. We all have this existential fear and in principle it is nothing other than the fear of death. It can be so deeply anchored that we don't even notice it and we are not aware of it. If we describe our feelings and question them further and further, we can identify these original feelings.
However, if you feel your feelings through layer by layer, you arrive there, e.g. with the existential fear that lies deep at the bottom of our emotional world. If you also allow this feeling and feel it through, you will notice that your emotional life changes.
Describing feelings: conclusion
With this approach you are in lively contact with your feelings. If you dedicate yourself to your existential fears in this way, your fears and worries in everyday life will decrease. This enables you to trust life more and to develop yourself.
You can find more exercises to connect with your feelings in the book “Things I would have liked to know when I was 21”. You will find an intensive course in the conscious handling of your emotions in the video course. There I pass on all the knowledge that helped me on my way to feelings.
These exercises to get in touch with your own feelings are the first steps in describing feelings. If you know how you are and you can describe your feelings, you are also able to come into lively contact with the environment and share your feelings.
Do you have any questions about this?Feel free to post them in a comment below or share your experience of dealing with and describing your feelings.
Suppress FeelingsAllow FeelingsUnderstand FeelingsDescribe FeelingsDevelop FeelingsShow FeelingsDealing with FeelingsOpen your heart and feel more
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Author: Elias Fischer
Hello! I work as a companion for self-realization and support people to find themselves and to really live their own life. It is my concern that you live yourself completely with everything that is inherent in you. Find out more about the exciting journey of self-knowledge and become more self-actual. // About me. Your Elias Fischer
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